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Garbage Root Beers Rated from Horrible to the Worst Ever
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Americana Cream Style Root Beer

At first this was okay but the licorice in the Aftertaste became overpowering so I could barely choke it down. If you are someone who likes licorice in your root beer I am sure you will love this. I, however, despise it. The Body isn't that good and the Head is lacking. Bite is too much with the licorice. I got this in Seattle but I don't know why you would want it.

Etna Brewing Company Root Beer

The Body has a dominant wintergreen flavor mixed with anise. It's also rather strange and medicinal tasting and not terribly strong. The Bite is smooth for the most part but sort of sour. The Head is short but frothy, though it does fizz down faster than it should. The Aftertaste is a bitter wintergreen and anise flavor that lingers too long and turns gross as it does. I don't like this at all, though it smells great before you taste it.

Myers Avenue Red Root Beer

The Body is overpoweringly fruity and sour. There's a little hint of cinnamon in there but it's not a spicy cinnamon, more just the flavor so it doesn't really mix with the fruity sour at all. The Bite is very sour and acidic. The Head is super tall, as it used to be, rivaling the other top root beer Heads. The Aftertaste is more fruity with a little cinnamon and the slightest hint of vanilla. What have you done Myers? What have you done? Why did you change your recipe? To see the original review, click here

Weeping Radish Root Beer

The Body is weak and fruity and almost tastes like there's some sort of fruit or vegetable vinegar in it. Is there actual radish in it? Maybe ... There's a slight vanilla and honey flavor as well but it is seriously overshadowed. The Bite is sour and acidic. The Head is tall and frothy, that at least is going for it. The Aftertaste is sour and fruity. Yuk.

R & B Produce Homemade Root Beer

The Body is yeasty, sour, fruity, and weak in the normal root beer flavor department. There's a sour acidic type of carbonation Bite that isn't very pleasant. The Head is medium tall but fizzes away very quickly. The Aftertaste is sour yeastiness. So, light on root beer, high on sour yeast. You can guess how I feel about that.

Vermont Sweetwater Rugged Mountain Root Beer

The Body is sweet and light and really tastes nothing like root beer. There is a crisp cane sugar flavor, some ginger and a little creamy vanilla. The Bite is also very light with a little prickle from the ginger and carbonation. The Head is tall but fizzes away very quickly. The Aftertaste is ginger and vanilla. The color of this is clear. This isn't a root beer. It's a ginger ale, a creamy vanilla ginger ale that someone slapped a root beer label on. I am not amused.

Stone Cellar Root Beer

The Body is extremely light. The only flavors other than sugar are the subtlest hints of ginger and maybe some sarsaparilla. There is also the faintest trace of fruity in the nearly flavorless drink. The Bite has some sharp carbonation burn but nothing else. The Head is tall and frothy and is most excellent. It's a shining beacon in the otherwise dismal brew. The Aftertaste is merely a shadow of sugar and fruity that's gone before you even realize it was there. This stuff is the color of sparkling apple cider and not only does it not taste like root beer; it doesn't really taste like anything.

Olde Brooklyn Williamsburg Root Beer

This stuff is not good. The Body is very hollow and watery. It is sweet with a candy flavor, but it doesn't really taste like root beer. The Bite is nonexistent and neither is the Head. In fact, this root beer is almost completely flat. The Aftertaste is weak and fruity with a hint of cream. It didn't make me gag, but I wouldn't touch it again. This was ordered online.

Grown-up Soda Dry Root Beer Bottle

Grown-up Soda Dry Root Beer

This has a most amazing Head, like a Henry's, tall and frothy and lingers for ages. However, that is all this has going for it. The Body is gross. It is weak and really sour. There's only the tiniest hint of vanilla and other root beer flavor but they're diluted to the point of being gross and drowned out by sour. Dry indeed! The Bite is horrendous. There are no spices but plenty of acid burn. The Head, for all it's height and frothiness, tastes worse than the liquid so I actually wish it were much shorter. The Aftertaste is more sourness that lingers way too long. It's like drinking straight carbonated water, but worse actually because those tiny hints of sugar and flavors make the whole thing just taste like a big mistake. If this is truly what grown up soda is, I'm moving to Neverland.

Square Root London Root Beer Bottle

Square Root London Root Beer

This has a Body that is sour with lots of bitter root and herb flavors mixed together like so much medicine. There's a lot of strange complexity to it but none of it do I find pleasant. The Bite is lacking though it isn't smooth. There's some spice presence but it doesn’t really bite as it were. The Head, however, is a wonderful exception that makes it look like a proper root beer when poured. The Aftertaste is more bitter, medicinal flavours, sourly fading but not quickly enough. It does have a very pretty bottle though.

RootJack Orange Flavored Root Beer Bottle

RootJack Orange Flavored Root Beer

The Body has a strong and sour orange flavor that quickly masks out all others. As that fades, guarana and more standard root beer flavors begin to surface, mixed with some gross herbal notes. The Bite is solid but wrong. It burns with acid and herbs and isn't pleasant. The Head is impressive, most impressive. Dare I say, perfect! It's super tall, frothy, and lasts about forever. It rivals the best root beer Heads I've ever seen. The Aftertaste is a super sour orange with a nasty medicinal herb flavor. Gross. This root beer is just so wrong, but the bottle is really cool and that impressive Head earns it another half a keg.

Olde Heritage Root Beer

The Body has a light generic root beer flavor and a good amount of yeast. It is only mildly sweet and kind of sour as well. The yeast is pretty dominant but not overpowering. There really isn't any Bite at all, no spice and hardly any carbonation fizz (despite the yeast). There is no Head at all. That's really surprising. The Aftertaste is a light sour yeasty flavor. This root beer has a lot wrong with it and not a lot right. It doesn't make me gag, but I do shudder if I take a big gulp and swallowing is always a conscious decision.

Squamscot Root Beer Bottle

Squamscot Root Beer

Whenever I get a new root beer I think to myself, "this could be the best root beer ever." This time, I couldn't have been more wrong. The Body is weak and watery with slight hints of root beer flavors. It's not good at all. It's not really anything at all. Then the Bite attacks you. It is a weird, sharp, baking soda-ish Bite. It comes out of nowhere, masking out the other flavors (which is next to nothing to be sure) and bites the tongue, leaving a sort of sickening feeling, and then dissipates into realms unknown. I've never experienced anything quite like it. The Head is dismal. The first bottle I had was completely flat and the others were hardly better. The Aftertaste is a light cane sugar flavor haunted by the ghosts of the unknown Bite. It's hard to find a redeeming feature with this brew, there's just nothing right about it. Perhaps they should call it Scumscot.

Stubborn Soda Classic Root Beer Bottle

Stubborn Soda Classic Root Beer

The Body is soapy and sour with an unpleasant stevia flavor as well. Hidden behind all of that is the slightest bit of traditional root beer. The Bite is acidic and prickly, the worst kind. The Head is medium height but fizzes down too fast. The Aftertaste is chemical that fades into stevia. Yuck. Seriously, yuck.

Napa Valley Soda Company Rutherford Root Beer Bottle

Napa Valley Soda Company Rutherford Root Beer

Yuk! The Body is weak, watery, fruity, and tastes kind of like a cola or maybe medicine. There only a very little Head. The Bite, however, is good. The Aftertaste is fruity and medicine like that left a bad taste in my mouth long after I was finished drinking it. It says on the bottle that Napa Valley is synonymous with quality, good taste and natural beauty. If this is true, I don't know how this root beer slipped by them.

Journey Shenandoah Sassafras Root Beer Bottle

Journey Shenandoah Sassafras Root Beer

Oh this is awful. The Body is weird, the Head is weak, the Aftertaste made me almost vomit, and the Bite has nothing notable. It does have pretty bottle though.

Septimus Spyder Root Beer Bottle

Septimus Spyder Root Beer

This has a mildly sweet medium Body that is extremely different than any other root beer I've ever tasted. The strange herbal flavor has some of the standard root beer essences but also some other stuff that just isn't right. It almost tastes like fermented bubble gum at some point and then a medicine. It almost makes me want to gag but then doesn't quite. This is probably because the flavor isn't very strong. There's a noticeable ginger flavor but no Bite at all, nothing. The Head is similar, a few bubbles but it doesn't even cover the entire surface and there isn't even a fizz release. "Lightly Carbonated" indeed! The Aftertaste is a sort of fermented fruity herbal flavor. I really don't like this one bit. There is nothing good about it except for its bottles, either wax dipped glass bottles or wax sealed stone crocks. That definitely earns it a keg.

Marco Root Beer Root Beer Bottle

Marco Root Beer

The Body sour, and icky, and yeasty. It’s really bad. The Bite is something prickly and spicy, but it isn’t good. The Head is super tall and foamy, so that is going for it at least. The Aftertaste is sour sarsaparilla that leaves a chalky residue in your mouth. I hate this.

Glacier Brewing Company Root Beer Bottle

Glacier Brewing Company Root Beer

The Body is sour with a light sarsaparilla and vanilla flavor. It’s also soapy with bitter notes. The Bite is sharp and sour, almost a fermented sour. The Head is too much, I never thought I’d say it, but it is. Pouring in 10% of the bottle fills my 20 ounce mug with foam. It also never seems to go away. And it tastes nasty. The Aftertaste is sour and bitter without much flavor. The bottle is kind of pretty though.

XTZ Root Beer Riot Root Beer Bottle

XTZ Root Beer Riot

This stuff is plain awful. The Body is weak at best but the Head is good. The Bite if any can only be described as weird. The Aftertaste is a strange combination of ginseng and other herbal stuff that tastes like medicine. The bottle is not that pretty. My friend got this in Seattle.

Journey Desert Sage Root Beer Bottle

Journey Desert Sage Root Beer

Ew! The Body has a gross fruity medicine like flavor which is painful to drink. It is thankfully rather watery for if it were stronger I would probably have puked. It doesn't really have a Bite, and there is no Head to speak of whatsoever. In all honesty it is the worst root beer head I have ever seen. There is not much Aftertaste but what is there is bad. How they can even pretend that this is root beer? The bottle is pretty but it was so awful in so many other aspects as to negate half of the keg awarded for the prettiness of the bottle. I ordered this online but would never do so again.

Free Natural Root Beer

The Body is sour and sort of rancid. It tastes like nasty apple juice that someone threw some weird herbs into. Most likely because they sweeten it with apple juice concentrate. The Bite is pretty mild, some carbonation mostly but a little herbal-ness. The Head is the only redeeming feature; though it isn't much go on about. It is short, about an inch at the most, but rather frothy. It isn't a good Head by any means, but it isn't terrible. The Aftertaste is some medicinal herbal apple stuff with a hint of sarsaparilla. Not only does this taste terrible, it doesn't even begin to taste like root beer, and the little green bottle with the cheapo label ... Not Pretty!

Rat Bastard Root Beer

I think that for this one I will only use the expletives that appear on the bottle. The Body was gross, strange, kinda fruity with a dash of cola? The Head was near nonexistent. There was a harsh Bite, but it was from many strange herbs and things that should NEVER be put in root beer. It made me stick my tongue out of my mouth repeatedly after each swallow (I guess that my tongue was trying to wipe the flavor off or something.) But then came the Aftertaste which was the same rancid flavor that made me stick my tongue out in the first place. In short it was as the bottle boasts, it "tastes like a son of a bitch." To top it all off, it has an ugly and offensive bottle. I do not recommend it to anyone.

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